Householder Zen

Unlike early Buddhism, Zen espoused the view that householders as well as monastics could achieve enlightenment in this lifetime. Good thing. I came to Zen with a family and a career. What I found was ambivalence. The monastic ideal of devoting oneself fully to the Dharma was everywhere. Was lay practice really possible?

I was fortunate. Although my teacher, Roshi Bernie Glassman, had given up his career in aerospace, he never encouraged me to give up my career in mental health. Never, although he had the opportunity. When Morri was not yet two years old, I was offered an early retirement option. I was 57. I figured I needed to work until Morri graduated from college. I’d already worked for New York State for 20 years. They were good years, but I didn’t see how could do another twenty in the same harness. Besides, if I retired, I could lock in my pension for Dee. If I didn’t and dropped dead on the job, she’d get only a meager death benefit, enough to pay for a funeral. Still, stepping away from a good salary was risky. What should I do? I flew out to La Honda for Bernie’s advice. I got no advice, not even a hint, but on the plane home I knew I was retiring. I was going to see where the peacemaker path would take me if I gave it some room.

My pension was small. Social security wouldn’t kick in for a few years. Although Dee was working, I still needed to earn something. I hustled some consulting gigs. Some showed peacemaker promise but didn’t materialize. Finally, a door opened. We created a not-for-profit to support survivors of long-term, psychiatric hospitalization, creating opportunities for artists living with mental illnesses, plunging me into social entrepreneurship, and leading to the development of the network of charter schools which we built on Staten Island. It was 9 years from retirement to the opening of that first school and the first real salary.  For the next twelve years, those schools were the center of my Zen practice, my householder Zen.